If you are human, you will have opportunities to be hurt and offended. But it’s how we deal with that offense that matters.
Luke 17:1 says, “For it is impossible that no offenses will come.”
We live in a fallen world. We have no control over whether offense will come into our lives or not. However, we do have control over whether we become offended.
The Apostle Paul certainly had the opportunity to get hurt and offended by others. Let’s look at how he handled it!
How Paul Handled Offense
You might be thinking, “Paul was a giant in the faith. This same man, who wrote most of the New Testament and went about healing and teaching, how could he get offended?”
From the time had converted to Christ to the time he died a martyr’s death, Paul had been beaten, shipwrecked, stoned, and left for dead-- multiple times! Paul’s writings contain incredible insight into what he was thinking at the time.
In Hebrews 12: 12-13 he said, “Therefore strengthen the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be dislocated, but rather be healed.”
Hands hanging down and feeble knees…Paul knew what it felt like to be brokenhearted and crushed in spirit. He had many offenses come to him, yet he did not allow himself to become bitter and offended.
Stay the Course
Notice the word “dislocated” in the scripture above. Many times, our first reaction to offense is the desire to dislocate or disconnect. Out of a place of self-preservation, we may want to hide or not be around any more people.
“I can’t open myself up to love anyone else; I’m just going to get hurt.”
Dislocation has the potential to steer us way off course. It can keep us from seeing and hearing the Lord clearly; ultimately, we could become dislodged from our purpose.
Offenses will come. We have no control over that. But we do have control over how we deal with them. We don’t have to allow ourselves to become offended.
Look at Hebrews 12:15: “looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this, many become defiled…”
If we allow ourselves to become offended, and then withdraw and isolate from other relationships, we cut ourselves off from the grace God has given us to overcome in this situation.
His grace gives us a supernatural power to overcome every offense and walk in forgiveness. His grace can also be found in the divine connections that He has placed around us… if we are looking.
Strength in Divine Connections
Paul knew the importance of divine connections in his life. He demonstrates this in a letter to the Corinthian church:
There was a door opened by the Lord for Paul to preach the gospel in Troas. But interestingly, he left Troas because he was alone.
The great Apostle Paul who had performed all these miracles and planted multiple churches, chose not to walk through this door that God opened for him!
Paul chose to go to Macedonia instead because he knew he could not accomplish the work in Troas by himself. We find out later in Chapter 7 that the mission to Macedonia was not an easy one:
“For indeed, when we came to Macedonia, our bodies had no rest; we were troubled on every side. Outside were conflicts, and inside were fears. Nevertheless, God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus, and not only by his coming but also by the consolation with which he was comforted in you when he told us of your earnest desire, your mourning, your zeal for me so that I rejoiced even more" (2 Corinthians 7:5-7).
There is no mention of God opening a door while in Macedonia. However, God still released grace and comfort for Paul, through his friend Titus. Paul knew that he could not face the hardships coming his way without his friend Titus, his brother in Christ. Perhaps he knew he had the potential to become offended without close friends surrounding him.
God’s grace offers us the supernatural courage we need to reach out and be vulnerable in community again. He uses the divine connections in our lives to show us comfort, forgiveness, and the grace we need to endure any offense or hardship.
Resist the Downward Spiral
We can’t live a cynical life. We can’t live with our hearts being wounded.
Allowing ourselves to stay stuck in offense leaves us susceptible to a downward pull, and our hearts will become more and more hardened by life. Jesus told us what the downward spiral of a heart that has become offended looks like:
“And then many will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another. Then many false prophets will rise up and deceive many. And because lawlessness will abound, the love of many will grow cold. But he who endures to the end shall be saved. And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in all the world as a witness to all the nations and the end will come.” -Matthew 24:10-14
Here, Jesus says we can be delivered from the hurt of offense if we can endure to the end.
How do we do this, exactly?
We have a choice of whether to allow ourselves to become offended. "Enduring to the end" is simply resisting the temptation to become offended by choosing to guard our hearts from offense. But sometimes this is harder than it looks. We can’t do it on our own.
Find your divine community and resist the downward spiral.
Conclusion
Offenses will come, but we don’t have to get offended.
Access the grace God has given you and let Him heal your heart. When you are tempted to stop trusting and to close your heart off from others, don’t.
Say this out loud:
I choose to value the cross, greater than my pain and loss.
I choose to value what Jesus did for me, greater than what people did to me.
Trust in His power and rest in His grace to walk through the fire. You could come out on the other side without even smelling like smoke!
Find the help and healing you need from the following resources:
Healing for the Broken Heart by Greg Mohr
The Source of All Grief by Andrew Wommack
Break Through Before You Break Down by Ricky Burge
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